The Southern Way

I may have been born somewhere else, but as my wife likes to point out, I grew up in the South, so that makes me a Southerner. And you know, I think I've finally realized that I'm proud of that fact. And here's some reasons why.

I go out and about, and some of these young kids and even some young adults who have the maturity of young kids just shock me. Had I even thought about acting the way they do when I was that age...well, there'd be a LOT of trouble, and it'd all be on me.

As a Southerner:
You learn to say yes mam and yes sir, or you get smacked if you don't.  And even as you get older, you still feel the urge to duck if you miss the chance to say yes mam or yes sir to your elders.  That's called respect. You learn it, you earn it.

We did things because we wanted to, not because of gain. If we had a reason to do something, it was most likely "would my mom/grandmother approve?" If the answer was no, we had to think about it really hard.  Even to this day, I ask myself that same question, and I hope every day that I'd make my grandmother proud of what I do.

You weren't afraid to get out and get your hands dirty to help someone in need, whether it's a friend, family or stranger. Changing a tire for someone should be second nature if you grew up in the south. Helping someone in the yard was something to do because you were either bored, or you didn't have anything else to do.

If I got in trouble, I knew there was a belt, a hickory switch, or a paddle waiting for me when I next saw my mom. Furthermore, If I got in trouble at a friend's house, I knew there was a belt, a hickory switch, or a paddle waiting for me by my friend's parents. They had that right. And vice versa when my friends came to my house. And then, we likely got it again when we got home!

Words like COURTESY and HOSPITALITY are something you know, and practice all the times. Not just a phone line you hear at a hotel or airport.

We didn't have iPods and iPads and PSP's and MP3's and all those other abbreviations for electronic babysitter. We had OUTDOORS. Where we found sticks to run with, trees to climb and enjoy for shade, and grassy hills to slide and roll down while we wrestled with our friends. Other fun things we did was help Grandpa or Dad work on the car (see: changing tires or helping others), or work in the yard.  On the occasion that we did stay inside to play, we might have watched a bit of TV, but as soon as the cartoons were off, we were looking for something to do or we did this action called "read a book".

Smart phone? When I was a kid, our phone was smart. It was smart enough to contact the person whom we dialed, and that was that. And it sat there, in the living room, or hanging on the wall in the kitchen. And there was certainly no way as a kid I was going to have a phone to play with and call or text people all the time. And another thing. As a kid in the South, we knew the difference between your and you're, there and their, to, too, and two. We learned that in school, and we remembered it.  If you wanted to 'text' someone, you took a pencil and a piece of paper, you wrote something down, and you passed it along hoping the teacher wouldn't catch you.

We had chores to do, and we didn't complain about it. Or at least, we didn't complain out loud, because we got in trouble. And getting in trouble usually meant some sort of physical contact of a hard object across your back side, enabling you with the ability of standing up for a meal instead of sitting.

We knew what a gun was, and we knew not to mess with it unless an adult was present, or we were given permission. We didn't run around threatening people with them.  We saw the older school kids parking their trucks at school and occasionally we saw a gun on the rack in the back window, and nobody thought anything of it.  That changed with the 90's, when kids became stupid and irresponsible, and Rap became more violent, and less music and something fun to listen to.  Yes kids, Rap was once something enjoyable where people didn't do drugs, rape women and kill people. Look up Run DMC (one of their greats were when they teamed up with Aerosmith for "Walk This Way"!), Fat Boys, LL Cool J ( the guy from the 80's. Some of his stuff changed, but he was still pretty good.) Even some white guys had fun with rapping. They were called The Beastie Boys.

Music was totally different by the way. We had Southern Rock, and Hair Bands, and some of the harder stuff. Now, you have screeching, screaming and people who sound like their gargling with a mouth full of glass. That, or Justin Bieber. I won't even begin on him.  Music has definitely changed, and it's one of the things that make me feel old really fast.  I remember my parents griping at me for listening to 'that garbage'. Now, some of this stuff today, I wouldn't insult garbage by calling it that.

People as a whole were a lot nicer when I was a kid. The Southern way of things. A glass of iced tea, a shade tree, and kids riding bicycles while talking about girls or trading G I Joes. Spending the day in the woods playing with toy guns or even sticks was the norm. Staying out from the time you get out of the house as soon as possible in the morning, until dusk or when the street lights came on. Then the streets looked like a ghost town. My mom dated a guy for a while who could whistle so loud, I thought the kids in Georgia could hear him.  When we heard that, we had 5 minutes to get home. And we were.We pretty much could go wherever we wanted to as long as we knew what time to be home.  Wanna talk about being good in Math? Have you ever calculated how long it'd take you to get from Billy's house to home by curfew and at varying speeds? Yeah. We did that. Without hesitation.

Some of you parents my age or older, I bet you're reading this and nodding your head with a silent 'yup'.  You people younger than me are probably scoffing at this or laughing at the old guy.  But stop and think for a minute. How many times have you been in trouble? How many times do you look the other way or not pay attention to your children, and how often are they in trouble?  A paddle or belt across the back side only hurts for a few minutes to your child, but they'll think twice about doing whatever they did again if they know you're gonna do it again...

Somewhere along the way, we've abandoned parenting. Not forgot, just abandoned. Oh sure, we want to have kids, or we want to do the actions that cause kids, but we don't think about, nor want to deal with the consequences. That's where it starts, and it only gets worse.

Pull up your pants, get a belt, your hat either goes forwards or backwards, not sideways. Buy clothes that fit, and take that attitude and stuff it. Grow up to be responsible. Like your parents. Or your Grandparents.

It's the Southen Way.